New national survey of 5,000 Americans finds the obstacle isn’t death, it’s timing: Christmas is the occasion families avoid most, while a birthday party rates harder than a funeral.
SAN DIEGO, Oct. 2, 2026 /PRNewswire/ — Trust & Will, the leading digital estate planning platform, today released its 2026 Death & Inheritance Report, a national survey of 5,000 U.S. adults examining when, where, and why American families talk about death, inheritance, and estate planning. The findings overturn some of the most common assumptions about timing. Americans find it easier to discuss death at a funeral than at a birthday party. Christmas, not a somber occasion, is the single moment families avoid the topic most. And the families who do talk about it mostly do so on an ordinary day, with no occasion attached at all.
This is the first year Trust & Will has fielded a study devoted entirely to the conversation that precedes the paperwork. It follows the company’s 2026 Estate Planning Report, which found that 56% of U.S. adults have no estate planning documents in place, and extends that research to ask a more fundamental question: why do so many families never even talk about it?
The Inheritance Conversation Doesn’t Happen Where You’d Expect
The cultural script says families talk about inheritance over Thanksgiving dinner. The data says otherwise. Thanksgiving is the eighth most common occasion prompting these conversations, named by just 6% of Americans, and only 5% say their most recent conversation actually happened there. The single most common answer is that no occasion prompts it at all: 22% of Americans say the subject simply comes up, with no event attached, and 38% of the most recent conversations took place during an ordinary visit or phone call.
Christmas Is the Occasion Americans Protect, Not the One They Use
Christmas holds a contradictory position in the data. It is the most common holiday trigger for these conversations, named by 16% of Americans. It is also the occasion Americans would most actively avoid for the same conversation, named by 37%, more than double any other occasion, and it ranks first for avoidance in all 50 states.
Why a Birthday Is Harder to Talk About Inheritance Than a Funeral
Trust & Will asked respondents to rate how awkward it would feel to raise estate planning at five specific occasions. A family member’s birthday is the most awkward occasion in the country for this conversation, rated awkward by 63% of Americans, higher than Thanksgiving dinner (62%) or a major sporting event (59%). A funeral or wake, by contrast, is rated awkward by just 41%, and an ordinary phone call is the easiest setting of all, at 32%. The gap between the hardest celebration and the easiest non-celebration is 18 points.
“We expected families to put this off because it’s about death. What the data actually shows is that they put it off because it’s about joy, and nobody wants to be the one who brings estate planning to a birthday party,” said Cody Barbo, Co-Founder and CEO, Trust & Will. “Once you see it that way, the fix is obvious. You don’t need a special occasion. You need an ordinary Tuesday.”
Nearly Half of Americans Expect an Inheritance They Have Never Discussed
46% of Americans expect to receive an inheritance, and half of that group has never had it formally confirmed with the person leaving it. 12% of Americans expecting an inheritance expect to inherit debts or liabilities. Among the 4,304 respondents who lost a close family member in the past five years, 40% say that person died without a complete estate plan in place: 28% with no plan at all, 12% with one that was incomplete or out of date.
The Information Gap Between Who Starts the Conversation and Who Knows the Answer
Women are more likely than men to start these conversations in their own families, 42% to 38%, and their conversations cover more topics. But 56% of men know where their family’s estate documents are kept, compared with 44% of women, and men are more likely to expect an inheritance (55% vs. 40%). The pattern holds even after accounting for age. The person doing the work of starting the conversation is not reliably the person who ends up holding the information.
What Actually Gets Families Talking
Two things move a family from silence to conversation, and neither is a holiday. Americans who lost a close family member in the past year are more than twice as likely to have discussed inheritance recently (65% vs. 31% for those without a recent loss). And having a plan of one’s own appears to be contagious across generations: Americans with a completed will or trust are more than three times as likely to say the relative they lost also had one (63% vs. 18%).
Where You Live Changes the Occasion, Not the Outcome
Regional differences are real but modest, with one exception. The Southeast is most likely to use Christmas as a trigger for the conversation and least likely to avoid it; the West shows the exact reverse. State-level findings ranked across all five occasions show New York is the hardest state in the country for raising the topic on an ordinary phone call (50% rate it awkward, vs. 32% nationally), while North Dakota is the easiest state in the country on three of the five occasions measured. Kentucky has the highest share of residents who have never had this conversation at all, at 36%.
To view the full report, including downloadable charts and graphics, visit: trustandwill.com/learn/death-and-inheritance-report
About Trust & Will
Founded in 2017, Trust & Will is the leading digital estate planning platform in the U.S., trusted by over one million families. Our simple, secure, and attorney-approved online solutions empower Americans to create wills, trusts, healthcare directives, and other essential estate planning documents tailored to state-specific laws. As a certified B Corporation and Public Benefit Corporation, our mission to help every family leave a meaningful legacy is embedded into our business model, ensuring estate planning is accessible, affordable, and inclusive for all.
Trust & Will is advancing modern legacy planning with AI-driven innovation, helping families and professionals simplify complex decisions and accelerate collaborative workflows.
Our platform supports 26,000+ financial advisors and 145+ enterprise partners, including banks, financial institutions, attorneys, nonprofits, real estate agents, and technology platforms. Notable partners include AARP, Fifth Third Bank, UBS, USAA, LPL Financial, and Northwestern Mutual. With more than one million users and over $300 billion in self-reported estate assets, Trust & Will is redefining estate planning as a strategic pillar of modern financial wellness.
Trust & Will has been consistently recognized for innovation and leadership in 2026, earning a spot on the Inc. 5000 for a fourth consecutive year, Fast Company’s World’s Most Innovative Companies, the Financial Times’ Americas’ Fastest-Growing Companies, the Inc. Regionals: Fastest-Growing Private Companies, and Forbes’ America’s Best Startup Employers. The company also won Best Fintech Partnership at the 2026 Finovate Awards and Thought Leadership, Estate Planning at the 2026 Wealth Management (“Wealthies”) Industry Awards, was a finalist across five categories at the 2026 ThinkAdvisor Luminaries Awards, and was named “best for families” in CNBC Select’s ranking of the best online will-makers of 2026.
Learn more at trustandwill.com.
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SOURCE Trust & Will
